From a post by Connie Hultquist titled Do Not Mother Your Husband
I have a bit more time to write, so I wanted to share some
thoughts on men of God. Don’t mother your husband. Let him be responsible for his own sins. Don’t be like Moses and stand between God’s wrath and the sinners. Get out of the way, and let God deal with your husband.
And how does this work? Quit being the Holy Spirit to your husband. Learn in quietness and submission. Learn in silence.
Your husband is not your god. Jesus Christ had better be your God. Your husband won’t take you to heaven. And – NEWS FLASH – we as Christian wives aren’t here to be comfortable and go to Women’s Bible Studies all day. We are here to bring our families to Jesus Christ. We are to be helpers to our husbands by following them. If they don’t treat us as weaker vessels, then their prayers won’t be answered.
Oh yeah, they had better treat us right. Trouble is that God can’t chastise them, as He would have to blow us to kingdom come to get to our men. We mother them and stand in the way.
No man of God needs to be mothered. He has to learn to stand on his own two feet; and if he sins, he gets to pay for it. But when your husband sins, you don’t need to get after him about it. You can just enjoy him and love him and pray for him. Let him do his business with God.
Often wives worry so much over their husband’s sins that all they do all day is sit and worry. This is crazy and causes you wives to sin. You aren’t doing your housework, or looking after the children. You are in sin, and worry, and fear.
You must pray like crazy for your man, get the victory, and treat your husband like he is a preacher of the Gospel. You WON’T make it no-how on your own by keeping your husband in the DOG HOUSE and chewing on him all the time like an old dog. No, be free in Christ. God brought you to the Lord without anyone chewing on you. Let that poor man go, quit bugging him, and watching him like he was a baby.
He is a man made in God’s image. He is the glory of God, and you are the glory of your husband. You are to help this man to the Lord. Not by your mouth and your vain instructions but by your silence and by your good works and example.
You must never lie to your husband. Don’t sow lies into your marriage. No, not at any cost. Don’t lie about how much money you have in your purse hoping to save some back for a rainy day. No, tell the truth to your husband even if it brings you harm. I mean don’t tell him about past loves or whatever . . no. That’s under the blood. But I mean about household matters of business. Some men have lied so much they don’t know how to tell the truth. Well, you must never lie. Let them see this example of Godliness.
Don’t let them be babies by taking their place as breadwinners. Don’t lighten their loads by taking over for them in matters of manhood. Be a woman to them. Stay in your place as keeper at home. (Here are my thoughts about husbands wanting their wives to be in the workforce.)
There used to be an old saying, “If you want your man to be more of a man, then you be more of a woman.” And that is so true. Don’t cross over your line of womanhood to instruct your husband. Let him sink or swim. Stand on the scriptures that say that his prayers won’t be answered if he doesn’t treat you as the weaker vessel.
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
1 Peter 3:1,2
* Order Connie’s book, “Dear Kitchen Saints,” available on Amazon. It is autobiographical and tells the beautiful story of her marriage testimony!